instructions to contact me:

write down everything you ever wanted to tell someone but never did on a sheet of lined paper you ripped from the back of your green-covered general chemistry spiral-bound notebook from last semester. once you’ve written it all down, stare at it for at least 2 minutes, and then fold it in half as many times as possible– more than seven times gets you bonus points. take this very small piece of paper, with your biggest secret, and throw it into a nearby body of water. i may receive this paper, the chance of it floating into my nearest body of water is non-zero. however the chance of me being able to read it at this point seems to be even more insignificant.

for more urgent matters, please email me: rachelgerhardt10@gmail.com